Although Grandparent’s Day has
been celebrated around the world for many years, in South Africa, it is still
unknown to many. It was initiated in South Africa 1n 1996 by Age-In-Action to
simply give grandparents in the family, the recognition that they deserve.
The purpose of this post is to
therefore firstly honour my very own grandmother and let me tell you a little
about her and why I am so grateful to her. I was only 2 years old when my
grandfather passed away, so there isn’t much that I can say about him based on
my own experience.
My grandmother on the other hand,
raised me from the time I was 3 months old. She has been a mother, a father, a
grandmother and so much more to me. This year, she turned 88 years old and last
year, she fell and broke her hip whilst visiting us (she lives in Durban). It
was a scary experience and no one wants some at this age more especially, to go
through such. She had a first operation ever and we were so glad that it all
went well. This is just testament to how strong this woman is.
I could spend days writing about
stories that I remember, that depict her strength but of course, some things
are personal and I’d like to keep it that way. What I will say, is that she did
not have an easy life – yet, she was not only there for her children but also
for their children and to this day she still is.
It breaks my heart that we live
in two different cities as this creates limits for certain things I would like
to do.
Whilst both my husband and I have
our grandmothers who are still with us, my heart feels so fragile at the moment,
thinking about Kayden and the fact that he doesn’t have his grandparents
around. I often look at him and just
imagine how proud they would have been to see him grow and witness each milestone.
As I have memories of my
grandmother, there is a hole in my heart knowing that my child won’t have
these.
On the other hand, I have seen so
many elders being abused. Our elders are the pillars of strength in each
family. They have done so much, seen so much, been through so much, yet
somehow, when they become older and unable, we often take them for granted. We
can do so much more than we already do and for those of us who do absolutely
nothing for them – it’s time that we take a step back and give back to
them.
They were there for us when we
were unable, now it’s time for us to make sure that the last years of their
lives are pleasant and we should strive to make it comfortable for them.
We don’t realise what we have until
it is gone, then it’s too late and then we feel sorry for ourselves, thinking
about what we could have done differently. For those of you who still do have
elders in your life, appreciate them and let them know that you appreciate them,
whilst you still have a chance and whilst they are still able to acknowledge
what you’re saying to them.
Take photos, frame them and save
them if they’re digital, because one day when you look back, those photos will
serve as memories and if your memory is anything like mine, you will know that
lots can get lost but those photos will trigger thoughts behind those images.
My mum used to take so much of
photos in her time, but we sadly don’t have most of those and I wish I had more
photos of her and my mother in law, to share with Kayden, but I only have a
few.
Don’t just do something today and
don’t worry if you can’t even get them gifts, at this age, the most precious
gift you could give to your grandparents, is the gift of time. The quality time
you spend with them. The phone call you make to check on them. At this age, they become lonely and this is
when they need you most, be there for them. Remember all they did for you. Although
charities and strangers may be grateful for your help, remember that charity
begins at home. If you don’t value and appreciate
your grandparents, who will?
I welcome you to comment below on
what your grandparents mean to you…
