She is selfless.
She always cares about the wellbeing of others.
She is patient.
She is understanding.
She is unconventional.
She is hard working.
She is smart.
She is my grandmother and she is my mother-in-law.
I began writing with the intention of writing two separate posts, each for my grandmother and my mother-in-law.
Reading the first paragraph to myself, I realised that those words are fitting for both these special women in my life. I would love to share with you why they are so special and mean so much to me.
Yes, I am Grateful for My Mother-In-Law
I know it may come as a surprise to some of you that I feel this way about my mother-in-law but I do, proudly and happily so.
My husband’s mannerism and most things about him, shouldn’t be a surprise, looking at the woman he has been raised by.
I have heard and still do hear stories about mother in laws from hell. There are so many jokes and most of them negative, from complaining daughter-in-law’s.
I am grateful that I haven’t experience this, well not yet anyway.
I imagine that it must be very stressful and draining to think about how your mother-in-law wants you to live your life or do things “her” way.
My mother-in-law, even before I married her son, accepted me for me and I think this is what I love about her most.
This statement takes me back to the first time I met my husband’s extended family, we were still dating then and it was his niece’s birthday. I tasted “Bombay Sapphire” for the very first time and I loved it and of course, I had a little more than I should have. Okay…not a little, it was a lot more, I recall wobbling and giggling lots. How’s that for a first-time meeting of the family! Well, quite honestly, I didn’t plan that, I was just me, had a good time and wasn’t going to put on an act for anyone, unless of course that was an act – well, they never let me forget it. So, I am glad we can all look back and laugh about it.
The point of me mentioning that is…we should all accept ourselves for who we are. Don’t put on an act to impress anyone. If people love you, they will love you for who you are. Pretending to be someone you’re not, will be exhausting and for how long will you pretend?
At that stage of my relationship, if my mother-in-law was judgemental, she probably would have said something to the effect of, “I don’t want you bringing a girl like that into our family”. But she didn’t.
I personally find that these types of comments are very common in the Indian culture and fortunately, I wasn’t labelled because I drink and enjoy alcohol.
That “family” feeling
My husband and I was in a long-distance relationship (400km apart) for over a year. His mum, who lived with his sister and her family however, lived very close to me. Even though my husband wasn’t around, I was often invited to dinner and if not, his mum and his sister would often cook food that I love and “pack” some for me to fetch and take away.
I remember that used to make me feel so special, because I wasn’t even married to her son/brother and I already was being treated like family. It used to bring tears of joy to my eyes and as I write this, I smile whole heartedly, also very grateful for my sister-in-law and her family.
When you come from a broken home, like I do and add a few failed relationships to that; “family” means even more. So all the “little” acts of kindness and love, was making me feel special, appreciated and wanted.
I’ve become lazier since my Mother-in-law moved in with us…
When our son Kayden was born, my mother-in-law moved in with us. It was a change, one at the beginning that we were somewhat nervous about, as we all know, it’s never easy living with anyone else, be it family or not.
It’s almost a year now and I am ever so grateful that she moved in with us. We have peace of mind knowing that our child is in trustworthy hands during the day. My mother-in-law even cooks when I reach home, just so that I can spend time with Kayden before he falls asleep. This feels like a luxury when I hear how hard other working moms have it. I am extremely grateful for this.
On the other hand, it’s also made me lazier, yes, I am admitting that I am quite a lazy person when it comes to housework or cooking. I’m not typically domesticated – I can be if I want to and I have phases when I really am.
However, with my mother-in-law being around, I’ve realised that I’ve become even less domesticated and quite honestly it doesn’t make me feel good. I do derive a sense of joy when I cook my hubby a meal. In an attempt to Tame myself in this regard, I’ve decided that I will cook more often than I have been doing. My mother-in-law doesn’t enjoy sitting and doing nothing, she likes to keep herself busy, so I must get to the dishes in the evening before she does.
She is Awesome!
She never complains or demands, she is an absolutely remarkable woman. It is a pleasure to have her in my life, in our lives. She never takes sides, she is fair. She listens. She is caring. She is kind. She is never imposing. She is someone that is easy to respect. She is dignified. She is a wonderful mom, grandmother and mother-in-law. She’s amazing, she truly is.
I am so blessed not only to have her as a mother-in-law, but to know that our child is in her care during the day, which brings me to the part of this post that talks about the special lady that cared for me for most of my life…
So yes, it was my intention to share in this same post why my grandmother is so special to me and why I am so grateful for her; but seeing how long this post already is, I am going to continue in a separate post…so stay posted if you want to know more about the lady who raised me from the time I was a 3 months old.
I am getting a little more personal in my posts with you and I do hope that you’re enjoying me sharing these details about my life with you…my next post is going to be even more personal and it’s not all smiles…
As always, I would love your feedback and comments…
Have you read these previous posts about Gratitude:
There is always something to be grateful for – Like My Husband
I’m grateful for: My Son