I am sure you have heard that many times before…me too actually. Well over the years it didn’t seem to have as much meaning as it does now. I’ve been listening to some of my friends and reading messages that they send me and some have said that I’ve been a pillar of strength to them, just because they were close enough to me, to understand some of the things I had experienced, which let me just say was “not very nice’.
There was a time I used to dwell on it, and say, “why me?” I used to sit back and just think about all the negativity in my life. I used to go to bed worrying, used to wake up with the same worries. I was afraid of so many things. I think to an extent in many ways, I also worried about what people thought of me.
People have been asking why am I suddenly so happy and always so positive, etc. so I decided to share a few things with you all, it’s just what’s helped me to feel the way I do now and I hope that it will inspire you or someone you know.
The day I started living my life for me and not worrying about what others think, was the day I started living a fruitful life. Suddenly everything I did, had more meaning. It’s not that I would do something, not giving it my all, but it just felt like everything was happening with ease…there was really no effort. I felt that I found my purpose in life.
I have heard so many people talk about finding yourself, about being comfortable enough, to be in your own company and enjoy it too, but I never fully experienced that until later on in my life. I had lived most of my life, with a deep desire of wanting to be with someone, wanting someone to complete me. Whether or not you come from a broken home or not, this is a need that most people have, but when this need becomes stronger than anything else in your life, you become less focused on the things that you should be focused on, simply because you are trying so hard to fulfil this need. I longed for this Acceptance and I searched for it from people who were not going to give it to me and the more I wanted it from them, the more I set myself up for disappointment.
My advice to you, if you feel this way, as I know many of you do, there is no need to feel sorry for yourself, there is no need to feel that you are alone. There is no need to need someone else to complete you. YOU need to find yourself and when you do this, you become your own best friend. Stop looking for acceptance from someone else, sometimes the reality is that no matter what we do, and how well we do it, there are certain people who will just never give us that acceptance. Take some time…find yourself. Learn to love yourself and accept yourself.
When you do this, you become so happy with yourself, that everything else in your life that deteriorated, takes shape. If you found yourself spending money unwisely, you will see that there are so many things that you can do with your money that will be rewarding and retail therapy or going to the nearest bottles store, does not count as productive.
If you find yourself drinking all the time because you are bored and you have nothing else to do, this is because you have created a comfort zone for yourself and make it a habit. A bad habit. What have you achieved from this? Where are your friends when there’s no alcohol or are they just around when there’s alcohol?
You will find that you also join different people. People who add value in your life, in some way or the other, when you’ve found yourself. What do you get from drinking every weekend and playing cards or trying to race someone from one robot to the next? Seriously, what do you get?
There is so much more to life, and life is not about being alive, living life, is about living a quality life and when you live a life like this, you find happiness within. These are the things that will make you feel a sense of accomplishment. You will feel the joy within. The voices in your head, will still be there, but they will be encouraging you to do great things, not have another beer.
I made many bad choices in my life and when I look back at them, those choices, have made me strong. I now made a choice to choose to live my life the way I want to and that’s simply by focusing on ME and my family. Ever since I have made this conscious decision, I feel more alive than ever. Even the people around me and in my life, feel my zest for life and this feeling just radiates sunshine into the lives of those around me, I am truly blessed to be that inspiration to so many.
If I could do it, so can you.