Love begins within. It seems so simple yet for many, the hardest thing they can do is love themselves. Before looking for someone to love, look for reasons and ways to love yourself. If you yourself don’t love you, why expect someone or anyone else to? Take a deep look within and find yourself and learn how to love yourself. Self-love is not selfish, it is important. Self-love is not vanity, it is for your sanity.
Self-love is about being content with who you are now and the plans you’ve set in place to transition to where you desire to be in the future. You are work in progress. Love this about yourself, don’t compare to others nor seek approval from others.
Look in the mirror and you’ll find someone to love.
Pamper yourself. Why wait for someone else to whisk you a way to some special place or buy you some gift? If you want those things, do it for yourself and feel proud that you’re able to – not everyone can. You don’t know how long it will take to find that someone special so don’t just sit around waiting – spoil yourself and/or others you have special relationships with.
Look in the mirror and you’ll find that someone to spoil.
…To make happy?
Nobody can make you happy but yourself. Sure, they can contribute. Never depend on someone else to make you happy. Happiness is a state of mind – YOUR mind. Think happy thoughts. Envision happy goals and speak happy and positive words. That paradigm will attract happiness into your life. Nobody likes being around someone who is unhappy and complaining all the time so be someone that radiates happy vibes. Try doing a good deed to make someone smile and experience the happiness it creates within yourself.
Look in the mirror and you’ll find that someone to make happy.
…To make smile?
Why look for someone who will make you smile when you are more than capable of making yourself smile? Do things that make you smile. Even if it means doing something for someone else, as long as it makes you smile to see them smile. Smiling creates endorphins which are feel-good hormones, so don’t be afraid to smile, you may never know who is touched by your smile.
Look in the mirror and you’ll find someone to make smile.
…To care for?
Before you seek someone to care for, look at yourself. Ask yourself if you have been caring for yourself or not. Not just physically but also mentally. Do you give yourself breaks? Do you give yourself time alone? Do you look after yourself physically? Do you care about your health? When you are in good shape, mentally and physically, it becomes easier and possible to care for others.
Look in the mirror and you’ll find someone to care for.
…To spend time with?
Spend time with yourself. If you are unable to feel comfortable with yourself, how do you expect others to feel comfortable in your presence? If you don’t have a romantic partner to spend time with, then look at spending time with someone else – a friend or family member. There are many places that you can visit on your own – pretend to be a Tourist in your local town and explore the sightseeing options and activities. Take photos and save them as memories.
Look in the mirror and you’ll find someone to spend time with.
…To Believe in?
Believe in yourself. Believe that you are capable of loving yourself. Believe you are capable of caring for yourself. Believe that you are able to enjoy your own company. Believe that you can reach all your goals. Believe that you are an amazing individual and that you don’t “need” anyone to complete you. Believe that you are better off on your own than with the wrong person for the wrong reasons.
Look in the mirror and you’ll find someone to believe in.
…To feel proud of?
Make a list of your achievements. Look back to see how far you’ve come. Think about the times you’ve been hurt and you walked away, didn’t you? Feel proud about that cos it takes strength and courage to walk away from someone or something that doesn’t make you happy anymore. You valued yourself and you didn’t settle for less, that is something to feel damn proud about!
Look in the mirror and you’ll find someone to feel proud of.
Appreciate your family, your friends, your colleagues and show them with a kind gesture. Appreciate the car guard who looks after your car in any kind of weather. Appreciate the waiter who’s on their feet all day, trying their best to provide you with excellent service. Appreciate the security guard in the area you live in. Appreciate the pointsmen directing traffic when the traffic lights don’t work. There are so many people around to appreciate – you just have to find opportunity in everything. Most of all, learn to appreciate yourself. Reward yourself with gratitude tokens when you accomplish something worthy.
Look in the mirror and you’ll see someone you can appreciate.
…To be kind to?
Be kind to the people that you appreciate – give them a token of appreciation. Be kind to your co-workers, to your boss, to your sibling, to your friend. Ask yourself how you can be more accommodating. Practice saying “yes, I am happy to help” instead of saying, “sorry, I am busy” or “no, I can’t”. In the spirit of kindness, give to those in need. It doesn’t have to be of monetary value. It can be your time.
Look in the mirror and you’ll see someone you can be kind to.
Look in the mirror; love, respect and accept yourself.
Never doubt that you are worthy of love. Don’t settle for less. Don’t lower your standards for anyone. If someone doesn’t appreciate you for who you are, it’s their loss. Don’t lose yourself trying to be perfect for someone else. Find yourself and strive to be better than you were yesterday. You are worthy of love and respect, never doubt that. Give it to yourself and never feel bad that you do.
One Reply to “Looking for someone…”
Yes Nicole, I enjoyed your article. I believe that in our age of singles, it’s normal that we are self- confident. We live in a society that comprises of more singles than couples. Obviously in certain cultures, it is not the ideal. With the development of mankind especially in the field of technology, our values have changed. The role of the woman has progressed positively. She can identify herself without a man beside her. The single man lives his manliness till he’s ready for a relationship. We are today more than ever individuals.