Men are quite different when it comes to women. Most women want to talk about anything and everything. A man just wants you to say the least if anything at all. Sometimes as women, we need to understand when a man does not want to talk. If he does not want to talk, there is no amount of tears or nagging or anything you say, that is going to make him talk. The more you want to “clear” things, to have peace of mind, the more you are going to push him away.
So rather, give him that space. Don’t push him, don’t question him whilst he’s watching the game. You will be making the situation worse. Yes, as a woman, I understand how you feel. You can’t eat, you can’t sleep, you can’t work, you can’t do anything, until you speak to him. Whilst you are feeling this, he goes on with life as if nothing happened and nothing bothers him. This frustrates you more, you wonder how he can roll over and sleep when you are right next him sobbing! Men are not emotional creatures like us women and they really do not understand our sense of urgency to “talk”.
Have you realized what happens when you force a conversation and when you insist on having answers then and there? Yes, it just gets worse and what should have been a discussion turns out into an argument, making matters worse.
Try giving him space. It’s not going to be easy, but if you want to feel better, it’s going to take some effort; some effort NOT to question, NOT to nag, NOT to seem “needy”. The one thing most men hate is a woman who is needy. You may say to yourself that you feel comfortable with him and you can turn to him, but in his mind, he thinks, “oh, not again”. Most men, although they may not all admit, appreciate a woman who has no emotional issues, be it PMS or not.
So, the next time you have a fight with your man, or want to “talk”, make sure you check his mood. If he is not in the mood to talk, you will not get successful results. Do not even try to talk to him whilst the TV is on. Give him space. Sometimes silence works wonders. Sometimes not saying something, gives him the time to realize his mistake. When he notices that you are not “badgering” him but seem distant, his love and devotion to you, will make HIM come to you. He will initiate the conversation. This is his male ego coming out and being in control. So allow him that space and time to notice your change in behavior, if he truly loves you, he will know when something is wrong, so leave that door open for him to initiate the conversation.
If you are unable to communicate with the one you love, it leads to all other problems. So start by fixing your method of communication or timing thereof and you will soon realize that you build that partnership again. You build a sense of security, making the other person feel comfortable to talk to you.
Remember, a lack of communication, results in misunderstandings and misunderstandings lead to bigger arguments. If you love someone, learn how to “read” them. Know when to speak and when not to. Sometimes in life, it’s better not to say something than say it at the wrong time just for the sake of saying it.
Learn to know the difference. It will help you to build a relationship based on comfortable communication with that special someone in your life.
Hi, I like to talk about everything 🙂 I agree though that its not good to force a conversation because you just make things worst … when I want to talk to my hubby, I also wait for the right moment … especially when I want something lol. Very interesting blog, I must share it because women need to read this!
Thanks for your comments Deeniese. I hope the women you have shared this post with, has also found some value in it