Well hello there February! Or is it more like….Damn you February! Ah…it’s the so-called month of love; Valentines Day – either you freakin’ love it or simply hate it. Either way, I thought that it would be fitting to share some of what I think are the most inspirational quotes from kids books/movies, with you… just in case you need or want a little inspiration at this time of the year, which I do know can be a little more emotional and less romantic for some.

It’s a long post…so now would be a good time to grab yourself something to sip on and maybe even a snack or two 😉

 ‘If you focus on what you left behind, you will never see what lies ahead.’ Gusteau, Ratatouille

If something didn’t work out in the past, leave it in the past, where it belongs. If you hold on to those memories, what time will you have to look forward to the opportunities that lie ahead? You may have had your heart broken in the past, perhaps even more than once – you’re not the only one and whilst it may seem unbearable and you can’t seem to find the strength to move forward because you continue to think of memories from the past, you will not allow yourself to welcome new beginnings in your life.

If you really want to move forward, let go of the past. There is no better time than NOW, to let go.

I’ve lost lots of things in my life, but in order for me to move forward, I had to let go, so that I could embrace what lies ahead. When I look back, it’s to reflect on how far I’ve come and that makes me smile, proudly so.

“The past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or learn from it.” — Rafiki, The Lion King

Stop playing the victim. Perhaps you ARE the victim, but will sharing that with everyone over and over make it any better? Don’t beat yourself up about it and don’t allow other people to do that either. No matter how much you were hurt, find the courage to move on. You don’t have to “run away” from it – confront your feelings, remind yourself how much you hurt and let that give you the strength to rise.

I’ve experienced more pain and hurt than you could possibly imagine and you’d be shocked if I shared some of that with you-  but look at me now, I made a decision! I could have allowed that pain to ruin me for life and continue to feel sorry for myself, or I could allow it to motivate me, to never experience that in my life again. I’m glad I chose the latter.

 “Life’s a little bit messy. We all make mistakes. No matter what type of animal you are, change starts with you.” – Judy Hopps, Zootopia

You made a mistake, or two, so what! That’s just life. Now pick up the pieces and try again…and again. Consider yourself more experienced and make those experiences count, by learning from them and not repeating the same mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. Acknowledge your mistake and decide to change.

Gosh, I’ve made more than one mistake, to be quite honest, I made the same mistake more than once. I trusted easily and it was to my detriment.  My life was a little bit more than just messy. I wallowed on those mistakes and the change happened when I decided to change. No more mistakes or repeating the same mistakes, I didn’t wear my heart on a sleeve and I didn’t look for happiness in anyone else but myself. When I learned to love myself and didn’t find the “need” to be with someone to make me happy, I started to live and enjoy life, I then became truly happy with myself and that allowed me to open myself up for the real love of my life…my husband.

“Sometimes,’ said Pooh, ‘the smallest things take up the most room in your heart.'” — A.A. Milne

It’s the little things that can mean the most. You don’t have to be extravagant or rich to be kind or to have a beautiful heart.  Say and do things meaningfully and with effort and that will take you a long way, because of your sincerity. It’s not WHAT you say…but HOW you say it. It’s not WHERE you go, but WITH WHOM you go with that matters. It’s not WHAT you do…but HOW you do it.

You could buy someone the biggest bouquet of flowers and have it delivered to them but if you can’t give that person any quality time – those flowers may not mean anything to them. Someone else may just appreciate your attention, just your ability to listen to them and not just hear them – that would mean the world to them, to know that YOU listen to them attentively.

In my life, I’ve been sent flowers on more than one occasion, by those were keen to date me but I never could pursue that further because they lacked substance in the things that really mattered and still do matter to me. No amount of flowers or any other material thing will take precedence over the good old fashioned character traits like trust, loyalty, respect, etc.  

 ‘Why fit in when you were born to stand out?’ Dr. Seuss

Don’t worry about what other people do and compare your standards to theirs. Set your own standards and live by them. You are unique, embrace that. If your likes or dislikes don’t conform to the norm, it doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with you. Own your individuality. Be free, be you, keep it real! If you want to send someone flowers for Valentine’s Day for whatever reason and you don’t like red roses, then don’t send red roses, if you’re unique and so are your choices in life, don’t feel guilty about it.

I often got asked the question, “why are you not married” and people often said, “oh shame, you’re not married yet.” I was 36 when I got married. If I could have had it my way, I would have preferred to get married earlier, but things don’t always go as planned and I didn’t settle for any less than I believed I deserved. I also got to a stage in my life, where I was able to accept not ever being married if I didn’t find that special someone, fortunately for me, I did find him.

But if that’s you and where you are in your life now and you’re worried that you are going to be alone for Valentine’s Day, don’t feel bad. Think about the very many people that are in relationships or marriages and that are unhappy – consider yourself lucky to not be one of them!

“Do not be fooled by its commonplace appearance. Like so many things, it is not what is outside, but what is inside that counts.” – Aladdin

Be careful about making judgement about people and their lives, especially on social media but also at face value. It takes time to get to know a person, some people, more than others.

Don’t judge them by the way they dress or the car they drive or the job they have – all that matters is what’s within. Those other things are here today, gone tomorrow and all that will be left is what’s within and if a person can’t love, respect and be loyal to you, then all those other things become pointless as the novelty will soon wear off.

I have been misjudged on so many occasions, people often have shared this with me…telling me that they thought I was like this or like that…until they really got to know me. To put it bluntly, people often have told me that they thought I am a snob – I don’t know what I do or don’t do that creates that impression but I am glad that those who did have the opportunity to get to know me better, learned otherwise. My life experiences have been far from perfect but not every knows or needs to know that. People don’t know your story…they will judge you based on what they see, but they don’t know the journey you’ve been on. 

“The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all.” — The Emperor, Mulan.

You’ve been through pain, more than anyone can possibly imagine. It doesn’t have to hold you back. Allow that pain to be the reason you are more determined. It’s often those that have experienced hardship, that do rise above the rest.

So darling, don’t let anything or anyone hold you back – not even your circumstances. You may have had your pretty little heart broken more than anyone else, you may have endured the most hurtful pain from toxic relationships – whatever it is that you’ve been through, remember, you have a choice – you can decide if it will bring you down or lift you up.

Haven’t you seen flowers that have almost died, come to life…it just needed a little water, some tender love and care and then just like that…it blossomed again.

So, this month, you’re going to experience it all over, there will be hearts and cupids shooting their little arrows and teddies and candles and all things romantic, wherever you go…don’t let it dampen your spirit. Don’t hate Valentine’s Day because your heart was broken or that you haven’t found that special someone. Do not depend on someone else to make you happy or feel special, you are more than capable of doing that for yourself and if and when you do find someone to do that as well, it’s an added bonus.

Until then, chin up, put on your best smile and spoil yourself, you deserve it!